home.

In my room is this giant armoire.  It came with the house and, as I was the only one that could use it, and it weighed 800 lbs., it became a piece of furniture in my room.  It has slowly evolved in to my linen closet (it was originally made for televisions and the like) and, sometimes, opening it is like Christmas.  “Will there be clean sheets and towels today??  I don’t know!  Let’s find out.”  Because y’all, it’s that bad.  I can’t remember if I have clean towels so that I can take a shower.  How sad am I?  Beeteedubs, I got around to doing laundry today because I opened the armoire 3 days ago to discover that momma was out of towels.  Yes, I just referred to myself as momma.  No idea how it started, but I just CANNOT STOP.

It’s finals week.  They call it dead week, but it is anything but dead.  I have a final Thursday, had a speech today, 2 clients want delivery on Thursday from shoots 2 weeks ago (which is FAST for someone who doesn’t do this as her only job, but they’re all like
“You mean you can’t just take the memory card to Rite-Aid and print them for me right now!??!!?”
“Um, GTFO.”
…..ok, we all know I don’t really say that.  But, seriously.)  What was I …right!  My to-do list is 8 miles long.  Why am I sitting here talking to you, you ask?  Because sometimes, as momma says, you gotta drop back and punt.  Remove yourself from the center of the chaos and think about something else for awhile.  It helps to gain perspective.

In the middle of dead week, because I like pain, I signed up for a meeting with my adviser about registration.  See, what ha’ happen was, my registration was like ohhhh, 3 weeks ago.  *Harris woman beamy face of innocence*  <–If you haven’t seen that face, it’s pretty great.  My momma is the best at it.  Anywho, I missed registration as I am attempting to transfer from one college to another.  I’ve already had a meeting with this same woman about the possibility of that and the result from that first meeting was that I wouldn’t be changing colleges.  Rather, I would be enrolling in both of them.  Didn’t I mention I like pain?

Yep, I am officially double majoring in both anthropology and Design Studies.  I came to NCSU in the “back door” as an anthropology student.  My entire intention was to transfer in to the College of Design.  However, there’s that finicky thing they like to call red tape.  This is a state-funded school.  There’s like 100 forms, all in triplicate, the pledge of the liver of your first child, this person in this office sends you over to this office to get this signed…I’ve considered selling myself as a tutor for new students attempting to navigate the financial aid system. True story.

While becoming a double major will require me to be here an additional three years, I think it’s the right decision, on a lot of levels.  To think that I will have lived in one city for more than 5 years is crazy to me. Overall, this must be what they call roots.  Wild.  It wasn’t until recently that I realized how attached I was to my church, and its people, and my life here.  It’s definitely not easy-peasy comfortable, but it is my home.

Vintage21 has definitely had a lot to do with that.  When I first walked in the door on Oberlin Road I thought “This…this…this is home.”  Being an active member of that community has changed my life on more levels than can shake a stick at.  Recently, we began a discussion on becoming oaks.  How we could begin the process of becoming gospel centered believers and, upon receiving my pledge card, I thought “I don’t think I’ll even be here in 3 years.”  Then, because you listen to your momma, I stepped back and punted.  Agreed that God will do what He desires in His effort to place me where He wants me.  Attempted to let the idea of my pretty little picture die.  Because, as my close friends will tell you, I really don’t believe in pretty little pictures.  Most of the beautiful comes from the imperfection and the messy in almost anything in life.  A perfect oak tree is stunning, for sure.  But, an oak tree that has struggled and fought and withstood storms and disease is by far more interesting. And beautiful.  Though my life in Raleigh is anything but comfortable and comes with a few storms and fights, I am now planted and praying to do what is asked of me.

This is my home.  Let’s get started.

PS – Because I like you: I really love the beginning.