One is not born a woman, one becomes one. – Simone de Beauvoir

November 18, 2009 § Leave a comment

Earlier today, we had a conversation at the Vintage21 church building about women.  This does not give you permission to casually move along to the next internet window.  Read: DON’TCHYOUEVENTHINGABBOUDIT.

Originally planned for the V21 church offices, it had to be moved to the building due to overwhelming response.  What does that mean, practically?  So many women wanted in on this conversation on the vision for developing women within Vintage21 that the offices could not hold them.  Childcare needed to be provided.  I don’t know about you, but I was excited.

Though I was unable to be present (as I was helping with V21 Kids so that some of these ladies could go), I was filled in by the totally awesome Paige Puckett, over dinner that she made.  Real food is the key to my heart.  Really.

From what she said, Vintage, as per usual, does not desire to create a structure, or program, or anything that doesn’t bring it back to the Gospel.  My church sincerely strives to base everything on the Gospel, and it has increased the value in my life.  And it doesn’t surprise me that this situation is no different.  While that fact makes the corners of my mouth turn up and my heart swell with love for my church a bit, I cannot say that it is the only thing to cause that reaction.  Loving on women has become increasingly important to me over the years.  Developing relationships that refine both me and the other person a bit are what I am hoping for.  Being in an environment where women feel safe, and understood, where they can build community and reach out to others has long been on my heart.  And the lack of it at my church, in a larger context than community groups, has been frustrating for me.  Especially as a single woman, I’ve wondered and mulled and prayed about an avenue within my church to minister to women, particularly with a staff that is almost completely male.  Please don’t mishear me.  Our men are incredible.  Watching how they lead, and love others, and serve, and strive, and admit their own imperfections, has raised the bar on what I expect in my future teammate.  However, there are instances when I want to talk about difficult scripture, or just talk about life, with another woman.

If you know me at all, you know that this is a very different scene from me of just a few years ago.  Things have been harder as of late, with songs like Bicycle Tricycle (by Rosie Thomas – you haven’t heard of her?  Please rectify that situation.  Now.  Go.  I’ll wait.)  The end of that song contains all of these recorded sounds of a family, and listening to it is like seeing a loved one on their return home from overseas.  Your heart aches at the sight of them, but it’s a good ache.  While I’ve always felt the tug on my heart to be a cupcake-maker, a boo-boo kisser, a lunch-maker, a BFF, and a more-than-friend to just one man, my basis for my femininity has not always been scriptural.  Nor have I always lived in such a way as to make all of those beautiful adjectives my life.  Creating a way for women to develop in to the women God has created them to be, scripturally, excites me.  The more I take a hard look at my life, the more I realize that I’m becoming a woman.  Let me just tell you, I did not see this coming.

And let’s get real.  Creating a way to laugh about things that men will just never understand, cry when life gets too hard, and discover that Jenny Mac only paid $16 dollars for that amazing sweater at Target, all the while with other ladies that love Jesus and seek to honor Him….come ON, how could that not get you all kinds of pumped?!?!

In the spirit of this, you.  You with the coffee mugs all over the house, the socks you took off under the sheets, and the incredible smile we just can’t resist… click Yes, it’s for real.  Yes, it’s worth it.


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